It has been said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. There is no doubt that those who occupy the majority of our time have a direct affect on who we are – good or bad. But the motive behind who you spend your time with can also have an impact on both yourself and others.
There is a deep desire among people today for authentic relationships. Many have befriended a person only to find that their new “friend” was only seeking a relationship for whatever they could get out of it. These types of “friends” are constantly asking themselves “what can she do for me?” The result of these superficial friendships is that many people today are suspect of anyone who desires their company and therefore keeps them at arm’s distance. When people seek a person’s company simply for their own personal gain or just to be able to tell others that they’ve spent time with a particular person, it is no doubt repelling and hurtful. This type of self-seeking friendship is rooted in the insecurities of those searching to find their identity based on who they are associated with. Their identity is found in what others perceive them to be, not who they really are. The outcome will only be temporary because if your identity is found in who you associate with, others may be drawn to you, but only as long as you have a connection to your identifier.
But when the one you spend time with and whom your identity is found in is Jesus Christ, people will easily identify you as such by the time you spend with Him. They will be drawn to God, through you. And those friends who seek your time when your identity is found in Christ are friends you can trust to be authentic and loyal because they are drawn to the goodness of God in you, not just you. They seek audience with you because they desire the qualities and characteristics you possess as a friend of God. Friends like these will not be asking “what can she do for me?” rather, “if He did all that for her, can He do it for me too?”.
So, who are you spending your time with? Through your friend choices, you are literally transforming your life. But most importantly, what image do you portray to those who spend time with you? Are they being transformed into your image or into the image of Christ who is in you? Examine who you are associating with the most. Is it the only One who can enable you toward who you were created to be? Or is it someone you think will increase your value in the eyes of others if you are associated with them? If it’s the latter, it is time to increase your contact with your Father in heaven who created you and knows you – not who others perceive you to be, but the real you. And seek to spend more time with other Godly friends who will enable you to become transformed into the image of Christ as you share authentic relationships together. After all, you are the company you keep. Who would others say you are? And who do you want to be?